Healing......

The couch is my new home. A Mama made blanket for healing.

This past week has been one of challenges and small celebrations.  I have been away recovering and healing from surgery.  My mastitis grew into an abscess which had to be operated on to be removed.  I have therefore been in bed healing from such.  It will be a somewhat long road to recovery as they are predicting 6 - 8 weeks until everything is healed.  This puts a kink in things here as I am not able to lift Lily and so someone has to be here to life here in and out of the highchair, the crib and onto my lap to nurse.
Nursing has also been in question here as well which has brought up lots of emotion.  At first it was suggested that I stop nursing as the milk ducts are leaking into the wound and therefore causing lots of drainage.  I had to carefully consider everything as I knew that I was not ready emotionally to stop and if I am not able to life her there would be this huge distance between us.  How would she understand what was going on?  One minute I was there here Mama to nurse, snuggle and care for her and then the next I had taken all these things way.  In the end we decided that stopping was not the best thing for both Lily and I.
So I am on the slow road to healing.  I am knitting a lot, letting people care for me (which is always difficult for me as I want to appear strong), and taking the time to let my body heal its self.  My body created this situation and therefore there must have been something that it wanted or needed.  Maybe it was my body telling me to finally REST!  This time last year I worked right up to the night I gave birth and then a week and a half later I was right back working.

Thursday marked my 29th Birthday.  It was a quiet day with small celebrations.