Letting Go

A week ago I had an experience that I has been on my mind since.  I have wanted to write about it but didn't really have the words.  Have you had that happen?  I know what it feels like but I can't put it into words.
Last Sunday was Yoga in the Park and was a fundraiser for Walk it Off.  I really wanted and needed to attend.  I wanted to show my support for this organization but also because my sister-in-law is involved and she is forever support me and my artistic dreams.
Sunday was rainy but I got myself together out I went.  I was  not too keen on doing Yoga in the rain in the middle of the park.  Was I ever wrong.   It was one of the most amazing experiences I have had in a long time.  I giggled as I slipped on my mat, sat in puddles on my mat, and tried to wipe the rain drops rolling down my face.
During the final relaxation after being up early and trying to not fall during the practice I laid back and relaxed.  I felt the earth beneath my body, I cleared my mind and the mist on my face created a feeling that I am not too sure I will ever be able to put into words.  Laying there listening to nothing but my breathing I started to hear the most beautiful voice.  Amanda was singing the chorus of 3 Little Birds and as she sang "Everything is going to be alright" I let go and the tears rolled down my face.
Yoga does this to me.  It makes me struggle, enjoy, open and most times cry.  

The Sketchbook Project

I have been inspired by a few fellow artists to join the Sketchbook Project.  What an amazing idea.  Go to the website, sign-up and get a sketchbook and theme, fill the book with whatever you want based on your theme, send it back by January 2011, and your book goes on tour with all the other sketchbooks.  How else can us artists be connected on a grand scale!
My Theme: Make Mine a Double.  ( I will try not to have too many alcohol pages! )

I am have been so inspired by the painting class I am taking it again in September.  Check out the website for more info if you live in the area.

A Girl, A Boy, and an Adventure

Newly cleaned, Sealed and Painted Studio Floor

Before

During the Cleaning.  It took 4 washes and lots of scrubbing to get all the clay up.  

After

It is amazing what a clean and organized studio can do for your creativity. 

Acrylic Love

The painting class has sparked something.  

The other day while wandering the aisles of the Dollar Store I spotted some Acrylics.  I thought I would give them a whirl and see what happens.  

First I started with Red, Orange and Yellow.  Loved it.  The color was so vibrant and explosive. 

Then the next night I moved into blue, green, yellow and brown.  It was a move calming evening and while I felt good after painting I wasn't as excited and energized as I was after the Red, Orange and Yellow.

The more I paint and the more I am aware of my feelings around it I am started to see how the colors bring out different feelings.  Painting has started to bring things to the surface for me and for the first time in a long time I am enjoying the journey of change and inward growth.

{this moment}

Beautiful

Beautiful

#29 ~ Paint

That's me in the purple. I was so nervous and scared to be there.  I know it is strange since I am an artist full time as a career, but I felt this great sense of pressure.  What was others going to think?  Since I am an artist should I not be great at all art?  Shouldn't I be the one who can create great things?   I wore white pants, so I am sure I was not thinking about using soft pastels or even painting and getting dirty for that matter.

My painting the first night.  We used red, orange and yellow.  The theme was focused around my body.

The second night we worked with clay.  We had to close our eyes and feel the clay, feel grounded and create.  I found this difficult to get out of clay production mode as well as thinking about creating something I was feeling rather than thinking about how could I create something that was functional and salable.  Then after a while we had to switch with a partner and create with their piece.  This aspect was almost easier as at first I didn't want to change anything that they had create at the same time I was able to let go and just create.

That same night we painting with blue, green and yellow.  The theme was thinking about how we felt at that moment and how did we create the things in our life.  What did we need to learn from it and why were we attracting these situations and feeling.  As you can see we had just gotten back from French River and I was still feeling like I wanted to be there.

The third and last night we talked about where did we want to go from here.  I LOVED doing the sharpie marker doodle with words.  I am a more words person.  I like to write, read and connect more with words.

Our last painting was with all the colours.

By the last class I was starting to work past my insecurities and just play, paint and let go.  I have dug out all my old supplies that I had thought would never resurface.  It has been amazing.  I am feeling more connected with myself, my creativity as well as being a creative being.  I find it difficult to take compliments as well as to identify with being a creative being and artist.  (strange I know!)  But for me it is more of a matter of HAVE TO rather than choosing to.  I am always creating something because it is what I do.  It brings me happiness and calmness.  I do it because I enjoy it, savour it, and can't think of doing anything else, it is just who I am.  So for people to say that it is a gift I don't quite understand, it is me, maybe the underlying theme here is that I AM A GIFT and this is what I have to learn to cherish.

The past few weeks I have been taking an art course and last week we made Waldorf inspired stars.  I have been wanting to create these for sometime but was unsure were to start.  I was so excited when we had the opportunity at the class.  Of course this weekend I had to rush down to Hestia Global and grab a stack of kite paper and make some for every window in the house!  They bring a brightness that only handmade goodness and sunshine can.

{this moment}

For the Love of Blueberries

This past weekend we went on our annual blueberry picking adventure.  It was an overcast day but we thought we would try and beat the rain.  Last year Lily was just a little babe in the carrier, sleeping the who time and not really knowing what was going on.  This year she ate and ate.  She walked around in amazement at the idea that blueberries were there for the taking.  Sam on the other hand went about the task of picking systematically.  He took his task very seriously, making sure that we picked the right ones and took out any that may have had just a little too much green or purple.  We were picking BLUE berries after all.  

I find blueberry picking to be the easiest with the kids as the bushes as just the right height for them.  They each get a small little basket and it is filled in a matter of moments.  It was far easier than both raspberry and strawberry picking.  

A Weekend in Prince Edward County

We can been going to Prince Edward County for the better part of 15 years.  My Mom has a place that can only be described at heaven and if you have seen a sunset from her deck I am sure you would agree.
As much as I stress about packing the kids up and sleeping in tents.  Worrying about the drive and the weather we will get, it all seems worth it when we get there.
The county is filled with food, artists and nature.  I am always not wanting to leave and thinking of ways to move there.  Maybe in the future it will be the location of my Artist Retreat.  

Knitting Adventures

When going through our pictures from our trip I spotted a trend.  If I wasn't playing with the kids I was knitting a few stitches here and there.  I am constantly knitting it seems and my projects are always on the go with me.  One sweater could possibly be on quite an adventure before ending up finished.

Here I am knitting by the Fire.

Knitting again

Relaxing with a morning coffee, hiding from the kids for a few months, knitting a few stitches

#24 ~ Go to the French River

Our first time at the French River will be one I will remember for years.  Paul has been talking about this place of his childhood since the moment I met him and we have finally made the trip.  It was as breathtaking as he described.  There was lots of family moments we will cherish.  Sam catching his first fish on the River, the boat ride all together, s'mores by the fire, the long hike through the woods to the falls at the end and the countless smiles on everyones face.
I am still cleaning the river out of our stuff, and trying to get back into a routine, but the tales Sam is telling everyone he encounters makes me stop for a second, smile, and remember our time together.